What Was I Thinking? WTF?

I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day… I thank God every day I am Blessed with another glorious day on this planet, It’s a GREAT DAY to be ALIVE!  Positivity!  Thankfulness!  Gratefulness! Carpe Diem!  Life is GOOD!

Exactly... Cut them lose for your own sake. This is not mean or selfish. This is a choice based on self-respect.:

It wasn’t always that way.  For years I somehow stayed positive and upbeat while being involved with an extremely toxic person in an even more toxic relationship.  Controlling, manipulative, selfish!  As I look back, I cannot fathom how I was so stupid not to see how one person could suck so much life and happiness out of those around them.  How could one person thrive so much on making other people miserable, or feel badly about themselves just to make themselves feel better and superior?  Then in the next breath say “I love you.”  I am a pretty strong man, fairly intelligent, helpful, giving, loving, and caring, so how could I allow one person to gain so much control over my entire life and do everything in their power to make me feel like a low life scumbag?  I have great kids, we had a nice house, we drove nice cars, but it was never enough to make a difference.  Hearing you were a piece of shit and not a good provider, and Don’t, Don’t, DON’T, can’t, Can’t, CAN’T can wear down even the strongest, most stable person over time.

Yup, Just like Jason and Jolene. Toxic people to the core. They lie, cheat, back stab everyone they call thier friend and or family, they both use everyone for money, $2,500 to be exact, that they refuse to pay back at all. Always saying they will but never do, they only ask "friends" over cause they have cars. Its always about what they can get from someone and never about love. So we are letting go and getting rid of these toxic people for good!!! Small claims here we come:

The good thing is, somehow we all survived and thrived, but how much better could we all have done had we not been involved with that toxic person?  Why didn’t I see it sooner?  Why didn’t I listen to others?  My parents, my brother and sister, and a few friends I had all saw it, but why couldn’t I?  How was I so blind to not get my kids out of that toxic environment sooner?  WTF was I doing?  WTF was I thinking?

Take This Life And Shove IT!!!

Several events happened at the same time one month that woke me up.  I finally said enough is enough!   I prayed!  I packed up and moved out.  I prayed.  I filed for divorce!  I prayed.  My Grandmother (my guardian angel) passed away.  I prayed.  I met Nancy.  I prayed.  I changed jobs.  I prayed.  I finally listened to good people and began to remove the toxicity from my life.  I prayed.  I thanked God and my parents for waking me up.  I prayed.  I wish I could tell you everything immediately got better, but Nancy and I had both been through so much with our exes, we did not know how to act for quite some.  True to form, my ex did everything she could to try to make our lives miserable.  The divorce was ugly, and took several years just because that toxic individual did everything she could to try to maintain some kind of control.  It cost a lot of money too.  Money we did not have.  We sure ate a lot of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and I’m not real fond of tuna salad any longer.  We prayed. We fought for custody which my attorney warned me was like throwing money down the well in Florida, but we had to do everything we could to get the girls out of that toxic environment.  We lost! We prayed.  Child support and alimony started. More tuna, more PB&Js, but with that time came more love, more understanding.  Nancy and I both grew as people, as a couple, as parents, and as people of faith.  We prayed and gave thanks.

Blue Zone: Nasty world of the big wide web:

WE MADE IT!  It has been almost ten years since Nancy and I left our toxic relationships together.  We love, we show compassion, we cried together, we pray, but through everything we survived, we thrived, and for some strange reason, I WOULD NOT CHANGE ANY ONE OF THOSE STRUGGLES!  We love life.  We made It!  We have six beautiful daughters, two absolutely gorgeous grandchildren, and a much better understanding of how to stay the Hell away from toxic assholes!  If you know somebody in a toxic relationship…HELP THEM GET OUT! RUN! Or You will have to get rid of them to avoid that toxicity!!

And to those toxic assholes…KEEP YOUR MISERABLE ASS LIFE TO YOURSELF AND AWAY FROM US!  WE GOT THIS!!!  Ciao!

 

I can train my mind just like in 2012 Navaratri time when You gave me direction. Everything got derailed the past year and I am sure You will show me the light again.:

-Dennis

Why I’m thankful for each and every one of my coaches.

I came across this photo today while scrolling through my Facebook & strangely, it couldn’t be more accurate. At least in my opinion. This photo was made and posted by a dear friend whom is a teacher and a head coach at a high school for sideline and competitive cheerleading. For those of who you may think that cheerleading is a rah-rah let’s throw my pom poms around and let’s see how short I can hike up my skirt, I can assure you, you are very, very wrong. Take a brief moment, open a new tab, type in YouTube and you know what better yet — click here.

Are you finished? Great, let’s move on.

And why yes, they may have on a crop top and a short skirt/shorts… it is no different than what your average college cheerleader looks like.. but, that’s another argument for another day. Now while I did do the rah-rah go-team-go type of cheerleading AKA: pop-warner, middle school and high-school cheerleading.. I also competed like in the video you watched above. If you didn’t watch it, or at least A PART of it, you won’t completely understand unless you are fluent in the all-star cheerleading world. And yes, it IS a whole different type of world filled with blood, sweat, tears, broken bones, huge bows, glitter, lots and lots of makeup and hairspray, late nights, 5AM practices and wakeups, lots and lots of traveling, 4 hour practices (even on weekends) and much, much more. In this very moment, I couldn’t even imagine not being apart of the countless hours of practicing, competing and traveling all those years. While I may not have realized it at the time, those coaches, the ones we may have been so angry at while they screamed and screamed because of each fuck-up we made during practice, are the very ones who taught us perseverance and strength and who taught us never to give up, and the meaning of teamwork. The very people who showed us unconditional love and dedication, and those very people helped shape us into the human beings we are now. Without them, we would’ve become a whole different kind of person.

I didn’t just come across such amazing coaches in cheerleading, but I also came across some wonderful coaches while playing volleyball, running track, and playing flag football. However, out of all the sports, cheerleading, without a doubt, took up the most of my time. Between going to practice right after school for school practice, then leaving there and eating something while heading to all-star cheer until 8-9pm at night, then heading home to do homework, get a shower and go to bed to do it all over again tomorrow. Practices even occurred on the weekends, 4 hours long. Now you would say that we didn’t have much of a life but in fact, our life was our gym, our teammates, the competitions, the hotels we stayed in when we traveled out of town to compete during the weekends, just wherever we were as long as our teammates, team moms and coaches were by our side – we were complete. Our friends WERE AT practice with us, their parents became our second parents/families, so we were as happy as could be until we didn’t stick a perfect routine and had to run it 50 times before we were allowed to go home….. No joke.

I am beyond thankful for how hard they made us practice, for how they made each obstacle seem like it may have been impossible but kept motivating and pushing us until we completed it to then give us another obstacle to tackle. Together, the coaches, our team, our parents, our siblings, other teams — we were a unit. A community. Together we were apart of something much bigger than ourselves and it really made us appreciate the little things in life. We thrive under pressure, we encourage the competition, we know what dedication looks like, we know what teamwork consists of, we won’t back down and we know that in order to achieve greatness, you must be willing to sacrifice things and we are 100% okay with that. My coaches were some of the most influential people in my life, people who tore us down to build us back up into an even better individual and an even better asset to our fellow teammates. They never gave up on us, they always had our backs, we always had each other’s back and because of that, we came out on top — stronger than ever. Every time. Win or lose.

So coaches, thank you so much for everything you’ve ever done for each one of us.

Thank you for putting up with our crap, pushing us harder each time, standing by us, supporting and cheering us on in the front of the mat while the bright lights revealed in a minute and thirty seconds — just how hard we’ve worked to complete a magnificent routine. And we owned it.

 

&& as for Adrian, one of the best tumblers, dancers & jumpers that I know. A coach and friend that we lost way too soon, thank you for constantly pushing us to be better. Thank you for screaming loudly, jumping up and down and cheering us on at the front of the mat each and every competition. Thank you for always being someone we could count on.  We loved to make you proud. Thank you for being such an amazing human being and thank you for being the best coach possible. Rest in peace. We will never forget you.

-Samantha

Everything happens for a reason.

Whether or not you agree with me, I truly believe that everything does happen for a reason.

I know death isn’t easy, losing someone you thought was your soul mate and trust me when I say this — I don’t believe that anyone should have to go through what cancer patients do. I wish it didn’t exist, I really do.

From the moment we are born, the clock begins to tick. Life is rough. Adulting sucks. We spend all this time as a child wanting to grow up faster. Then as an adult, we repeat our 21st birthday every birthday after we turn 30… I wish there was a secret to it all, but there isn’t.

 Some people come in your life as blessings, others come in your life as lessons.

We’ve all experienced a time where someone who was apart of our lives for years or someone we felt as if we had such a connection that there was no way we wouldn’t be in each other’s lives forever…and POOF – one day you never talk again. It’s weird, isn’t it? In those moments when it first happens, you ask yourself ‘What the hell happened?’ Sometimes, it’s simple. You went your separate ways and drifted apart and neither of you made much of an effort to save it. Or you got into a huge fight and you didn’t realize exactly how different you were so it was time to just let it go. And then there are times where it just happens in the blink of an eye.. a couple years down the road you come across their picture in your Timehop or their Facebook page. You reminisce on the memories and you smile, laugh, cry and that’s that. It’s normal. We all do it.

Years later, you finally start to realize the underlying reason why you’re either still friends or you’re not at all. This is why the perfect quote comes to mind, ‘Some people come in your life as blessings, others come in your life as lessons.I am a very outgoing, outspoken, loud individual. I was a cheerleader from the age of 2 until the age of 20. I was involved in many sports such as softball, volleyball, track (sprints, none of that long distance crap) and flag football. Therefore, I was always around people and I was always making friends or making frenemies. In the moments leading up to a friendship ending, you don’t quite understand why until years later (or you do because they’re completely crazy and you couldn’t get away faster) and then it all just clicks. It immediately makes sense in your head why those certain individuals never made it to your adult years. After high school, you go your separate ways, you lose touch with basically everyone.. But there are some that make it through college together. I have been blessed with wonderful friendships with the most fantastic human beings throughout my life and they have taught me some wonderful life lessons and they have been the world’s biggest blessings. I am thankful to each and everyone person that has come into my life whether they are still here or not because they have shaped me into the person I am. Each and every person has come into my life for a purpose whether it be at a good time or a very bad one and they have benefited me in the greatest way. I hope that at least a few of them can say the same for me.

All in all, some of life’s greatest moments are the unexpected ones. The ones you never thought you wanted or needed. Something that steers you way off the course you intended to take.. It’s all happening for a reason. It all leads up to something spectacular.. it just may take a little more time and if you’re like me, I’m suuuuuper impatient so I tend to go a little mad. Oops!

Like Carrie Underwood said in her song ‘Good in Goodbye’:

As bad as it was, as bad as it hurt
I thank God I didn’t get what I thought that I deserved
Sometimes life leads you down a different road
When you’re holding on to someone that you gotta let go
Someday you’ll see the reason why
Sometimes, yeah, sometimes, there’s good in goodbye

So yeah, everything happens for a reason. Simply put: There is good in goodbye.

 

 

 

-Samantha

Father of the Year Moment #1

Being a father of six daughters you love with every ounce of your being certainly has its unforgettable moments.  In this case, I knew I was never going to be nominated for father of the year in this life time.

Samii, our second oldest and blog buddy on this site was around 2 years old when this happened.  We were stationed at Ft Eustis, Va., while I was in the Army.  I had just finished PT on a very cold morning and needed to get a hot, relaxing bath to warm my bones back up before morning formation in the motor pool.  We lived in a nice little apartment on post near the training barracks so it was always pretty loud in the mornings with trainees running by singing cadence.  This particularly morning Samantha had had her fill of the noise.  As I lay relaxing in the hot water, mind out in space, the bathroom door suddenly slams open with a crash against the wall, and there stands my precious little curly blond locked adorable daughter Samii, clothed in the cutest little Lion King nightgown, hair all whopper jod and disheveled.  She looks directly at me, points her little finger towards the window of the bathroom, and says “Daddy those Fu#%ing boys just woke me up!”  At first I was in total shock at what just came out of my little girls mouth, but I couldn’t help start laughing as I tried to be the parent and said “Samii, you can’t say that.”  So she looked at me, obviously pissed off, placed her hand on her hip and said it again, ” I know daddy, but those Fu&$ing boys woke me up!”

I was done!  I knew it was the wrong thing to do, but I was laughing so hard because she looked so damn adorable, I couldn’t chastise her like a normal, responsible parent should have at that time.

From that moment on I knew with certainty I was going to be silly putty in the hands of my baby girls, and would never be nominated for father of the year no matter how great any of the  six would turn out.  And yes, I am still silly putty in their hands!

Please share with us any moment you may have had similar to this.  Not all of us can be parents of the year, but it doesn’t make us bad parents! It’s the little things that make us who we are.  We cannot wait to hear your stories!

 

-Denney

Introducing: US

Hello!

I am Dennis, a 50ish father of six, yes I said six, daughters. But the fun only begins there. I am as white as white can be, and married to a hot ass Puerto Rican woman. (Sounding familiar). I have 3 daughters, and she has 3 daughters from previous marriages. We do not use the “Step” word in our house, and we have been together for almost 10 years. Our 2nd oldest, Samantha (Samii) will be hanging out with me here and chiming in on all things she likes because she set it up. I am an expert on raising girls, so feel free to ask anything you like. I am also a self proclaimed expert on hot ass Puerto Rican women, so hit me up on that too. I currently live in Ohio and Samii lives in Florida. We wanted to have some fun with this, some seriousness (not a lot), some good advice, a lot of bad advice, and hopefully a lot of laughs. So buckle up and enjoy the ride. Ciao!

Hey there!

I am Samantha, 25 years old, fur momma to a precious little Skye Terrier named Bella and floppy-eared dwarf bunny named Sweet Pea. I’m married to a Hawaiian, Japanese, Filipino, Irish and French (Anything else, Case? Goodness) man who is pretty amazing and we have been married for less than a year but I couldn’t be happier. As Denney/dad/dork said earlier, we have a pretty large family and it’s absolutely incredible. Although Denney is not my biological father, he’s never treated me any differently than his very own flesh and blood. So for that, I am eternally grateful. Quick background: My father passed away when my mother was 6 months pregnant with me. (Yes, yes it is very sad, I’ll get back to the happiness now!) I currently reside in Florida and I was born in Ohio. I cannot wait to move to a state that actually has seasons! I miss it a lot. So my dad & I will be hanging out here with you guys and we hope that you’ll have some fun with us. We encourage you to comment, email us with questions, comments, concerns, opinions at (kooldad4everandsnodonnell@outlook.com) and enjoy the ride. Check out the ‘ABOUT’ section and that gives you a little more information about us, we didn’t want to bore you completely with our first post. I hope you enjoy!